I haven’t even started this article and I’m already done. But I’m also ready to let loose. Have you ever scrolled though your Facebook or Twitter or even Instagram news feeds and just ugh. People. The amount of bullshit I see is ridiculous. So many things annoy me and I’m not sure if it’s because I’m older and wiser. Pfft, wiser, nice one Adam.
My favourite thing to see on my news feed is drama. I lowkey love it. Take the other night, for example. I was scrolling on Facebook and I saw someone post about the third presidential debate. And thus begun my most entertaining night this week. These two people were going back and forth throwing whatever they had at each other about who is more fit to be President. I was enjoying every second.
Another favourite thing I like is when someone I know is “in a relationship with…”. I have no shame, I’ll do a good ten minute stalk to find out some info about them. Oops. Just me? Because seriously, I’ll find out about his sister’s boyfriend’s mother and how her recent trip to Italy went.
Unfortunately, I’ll see those posts that make me vomit in my mouth. Those “One month with the love of my life” posts. Uhhh, yeah no thanks. I don’t want to know about your one month relationship. And I’m laughing if you think you’re in love already.
I also hate those “like for a tbh” posts. So juvenile. I want to cry of embarrassment. They are such attention-seeking posts, just stop. It’s all fake and I can’t help but block every one. Unless it’s a “like this and I’ll buy you food”, I’m not interested.
And then I come to those pictures that are so attention-seeking, I cringe. This is more evident on an Instagram feed. “Woke up like this” pictures. No. Especially if it’s somebody you hate. Not today, satan.
My pet hate is when somebody decides to go on a rant post about someone that’s screwed them over. Oh my god, this shit belongs on ‘Bold & the Beautiful’. Let me tell you now… no one gives a shit. Those people who like those statuses and comment “<3 here for you babe” are all fake. Your true friends would be messaging you like “which body are we burying tonight?”.
Most recently, one of my classmates announced he was having a baby. I read that post while eating a packet of Doritos with my dog next to me. Who’s the real winner here?
Don’t get me wrong, you do have those brilliants posts. Whether it’s puns or memes, I am there. Any Harambe memes I live for. Call me immediately if somebody gets dragged on social media. It’s very important.
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